I was 15 years old when I first hurt myself. It started by scratches, then quickly progressed into deeper cuts and burns. I was hospitalized at 15 for depression, being fed many different medications, and after 6 months in an adult ward I was moved to an adolescent unit, which I loathed. By this time I had begun overdosing. Like the cutting, the overdosing spun out of control, landed myself in intensive care a few times. I experienced another adolescent unit a year or so later, where I was kept in a locked ward. It was horrific. Everything was made of plastic, the entrance doors were electronically locked - absolute nightmare.

I had 2 full courses of ECT, which may have helped at the time - I can't really remember. I guess that's the problem with ECT - loss of memory

Triggered by the ECT was my first hypomanic episode and that was when I was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder. My family history of mental health also plays a part in this diagnosis. I am currently taking an antidepressant and a mood stabilizer to steady my mood. I am currently having my 3rd course of ECT treatments. I am including a day by day diary account of this course of ECT in this restricted access area.

Everything reaches peaks and troughs with me, my self harm, my mood, anxiety. My self harm fluctuates from virtually no self harm to weeks on end of getting stitched up nearly every day, or admitted to hospital for an overdose 3 times a week.

Well, thats a little bit about me. Don't forget you can submit your stories and I'll get them posted on a personal true life experiences page

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