Stories of Hope

The Long Hard Road

I started self harming when I was about 10.  I hadn't lived with my mother and when I did see her, her boyfriend sexually abused me.  I cut in the anger I had for both my mother and her boyfriend.  I cut to make me see myself as a person - to become alive.  It is a long hard road for me to get over and sometimes I doubt I ever will, but I have that little hope that keeps me going and stops me ending my life.  I still am cutting now and I've attempted suicide many times.  All I have ever wanted is to feel real, important and most of all love.  I know I CAN get there in the end because I decided to seek help.  All I can say to those out there is think about the good parts of you and it isn't your fault you harm.  I think people need to become more aware about how many do this because there is a lot of us here; fucked up cuz others have hurt us.  We're certainly not freaks, just trying to cope.  Thanx for listening.  You can do it too.